16 down.... I think I made the cut for the week. Next round of whacks comes in February apparently. Time to gather a little scratch and start really paying attention to the alerts I get from the 7 Museum Job websites I subscribe to.
[It's pandemonium in the cubicles and Bob Costas is in the fray with a microphone, the camera jostles and rights itself. Goes out of, then back into focus, behind Costas there's a small group of people huddled up and mermering a chant]
Bob: "Were here in the aftermath of todays game, looks like the home team took a brutal beating with the score 16-0. Maybe we can get some feedback from the participants"....
(ShaggyBob blasts through the throng of people maddened wildly doing a hippy dance)
Shaggy: "WOoooooooooooo Yeeeeah, I said WWooooooooooooo M_F'er Yeah, That's what I'm talkin about!"
"You look like, like you're relieved by the outcome"
(comes to a complete stop then looms into the camera until his nose touches the lens, retreats again)
"WHUh? OOOH, yeah man.... I'm pretty psyched."
"Over all it was a tough match, but the team came through with flying colors"
Bob: "How can you say that with such a staggering loss?"
Shaggy: "well I tell ya Bob, when a devastating thing like that happens it's good to know that your friends and nightside co-workers have your back, I'm glad that our evening shift is fully intact, Hell man the paper wouldn't make it out to the masses without us!"
Bob: " I see, can you tell me what it was like out there?"
( bounces back into the hippy dance, twists and stumbles headbutting the side of a cubicle with tremendous force)
"It was really hard Bob, not knowing, but we held it together.... we knew it would be tough and the losses would be huge but we kept the faith and had eachothers back man, we didn't want to lose anyone from the core group"
Bob: "Well, congradulations on the kinda victory then"
Shaggy: "Wooooooooo yeah WTF MAN WTF?"
(Shoots back to the huddle and they begin bouncing in unison chanting something unintelligible, the bouncing and muttering get louder and builds to a crescendo. Shaggy bob flies back to the camera grabbing the sides unseen, begins shaking it).
"I just want to thank everyone on the nightside crew they're the best, man"
(turns to leave and snaps back to attention, points to the ceiling and slowly looks up)
"AND GOD... if the NFL players get help catching a touchdown and thank the man upstairs hell I'm going to do it to, THANK YOU JESUS for letting me pay my bills, respect brother"
(pounds his chest......turns to leave and snaps back to attention, again)
" HI MOM"
(takes a step back flexes/growls incredible hulk style, then heads back to the group)
(KP, Liser, Pat, Bob and Shagz begin bouncing yet again, then abruptly stop and turn back to back as if being circled by an invisible wolfpack, peering and squinting around the floor looking for the suits.)
The Shift Ain't over yet.
I feel as if someone will roll in near the end of my shift and say "thanks for working tonight peace, you're outta here." Wouldn't that just frost Satans nuts?