Wednesday, October 31, 2007

2hr goodness via verizon

Had a call today from some folks in AK...2hr interview with follow-up coming in the approaching weeks.

{$500 plane ticket, dry-cleaned suit, big ass smile, and proficiency with registrarial duties prescribed by larger museum type venues} could equal exedus from New York. New Pipe dream, you bet....already found a neighborhood close to the office, and a few places that serve king crab legs dirt cheap. (I don't eat seafood, so I'll have the Alaskan King Crab Leg platter, could you substitute elk for the crab please)

The Earl

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Nature and the Beast

??Do water foul get cold feet?? I can't tell, the husband wife combo Dynamic Swan Duo that lives a stones throw from my balcony don't look like they're even remotely interested in going anywhere for the colder months. The continue swimming around in the (inferred) frigid cold water of the pond. Inferred only due to the fact I haven't been for a swim, I seriously doubt it's on par with a hot tub. I also saw said Swans belittling the Mallards for being panzies. (no echo)


Parked in the lot, not movin' an inch.
The deadline for future gigs is soon approaching. The Accounting Department is working hard to medicate the ills of the real world, getting things in order for another jaunt into the unknown (ETS'chedule' Nov.15, 2007). The Transportation Division is making ready for a new E-brake and a legally just, inspected set of wheels. A week removed shouldn't be a big deal should I only take the vehicle to work and the market.

Happy Hour starts at 5pm on Friday Nov. 2nd @ The Oasis. Join me.

Get a move on Jo...the movie's gonna start without ya.

A Roaster, smashed, veg. medley, cranberry/apple chutney toasted on rye, wine, cheap beer, dessert?, and buttery popcorn goodness. Suck IT! Ramen

~After the truck lost its ability to stop a few weeks ago, I had the fortunate opportunity to deal with Monro Muffler in 'Cuse. In all reality it kinda licked the boys, and not my boys cuz that freaks me out in a silly WTF are you serious?! way. I had opted; prior to asking McG for some monetary help, to apply for a credit card through the muffler gurus to defray the cost at least for a bit until I was back on my sea-legs financially. (de-F'in-nied) Bully for them, they were able to wrench a ton of cash out of us both. Today I opened my mailbox (with the jammer key that never works properly) and wouldn't you know it...there was a letter from Monro, the damn thing included a credit card, presumably for use a few weeks ago, OH wait!?. I was told by 'Cuse Monro, on Brewerton Rd. that my credit was in the shitter and they couldn't do anything about it. Why in the hell would they be sending me a credit card if my credit is bad? why didn't they snap to attention when I really needed it? Who could have used it back then? What was their impetus for sending me a card now, with a 5,000 limit? I'll tell you what, my credit isn't bad...It's pretty damn spectacular, Chester and Zebb the two grease monkeys that were too busy punching my O-ring weren't all that computer literate to begin with and the function of their archaic system didn't allow for Momo's to fuckin hit the keys. "I'm going to use that stupid Goodyear Monro credit card, and buy a new set of tires, wipers, a signature service blow job, and a chance to get back my dignity. I'll throw in the office chair deuce for free. (if I knew where Chester and Zebb lived I'd dump in their pillow cases), and all for just 27.6% interest." Then again, maybe I'll just deuce in their chair.

Monday, October 29, 2007


After a couple days of festering, a few details from the party are slowly becoming apparent to me again....

I now know where the glitter on my suit came from (?! don't ask and I won't tell).

I did Not fall all evening even though a person trying to scare me hit me like a freight train after tripping on a root launching from their tree hiding spot.

I did finish all the beer I brought and then some.

Jello shots are the devil if you have more than 25ish.

A drink that tastes like a little league bomb pop is good until a certain point.

Red headed sluts are a great shot. when you chase them with Dewars

When you know someone just practically smoked their head off, probably not a good idea to say "Come Onnn LAaaaaadeh, hav another shot". Lower extremities tend to fail at that point for them.

I won the "Funniest Costume Prize for the evening" Didn't know until today, pretty funny hah!. (gift candle)

Left over party goodies make for a great dinner if you want gut rot and the shakes of sugary goodness.

Pictures are worth exactly one word...."Nerrrrrr".
Camera phone pics don't do justice at all.

I dropped half a jello shot in the pocket of my suit....the inside pocket? (got me there, I wasn't wearing the jacket inside out at all)... and I have a hard time just trying to pull something out of the inner pockets much less putting something into them.

Halloween Costumes no matter how cool you think they are need to have ready access to bathroom facilities (even if that includes whizzing on a tree or shrub, or if you prefer...and apparently I do, some dude's foot whose dressed like Igor hiding in said tree or shrub).

I completely lost my cheezy shades, but not my perscription specs.... that's a new one for me and I'm damned proud.

After a hard night of partying.. nothing says "I'm gonna sleep well, like a drunken bowl of cheerios" It also says...good morning sunshine, wink wink I'm the cheerios you dumped on your pillow last night, and slept on jackass"

I can't wait for next year!!!!!

Todays Randomness

Today's Randomness is brought to you by a 1br apartment with 3 digital thermostats, 4 time settings for each of 7days a week. The word be·fud·dle Pronunciation: \bi-ˈfə-dəl, bē-\ Function: transitive verb 1 : to muddle or stupefy with or as if with drink, and the number WTF, 60,58,70,72,40,Off, 55,63,78,45, Turn the F-in power off for all around?

You gotta be dry-fuckin me with this shit. I may not be the most technilogically savvy person on the planet, but 3 thermostats? My place isn't that big #1, and B.) you can't copy the previous days settings to cover subsequent days. I have to set 28 different temps 3X's. That seems to me like too much hassle, I had no idea it would take so much...I won't do it. Heat this winter...I'm just going to wear fleece socks.

The Oasis is cold my friends...cooooold

Sunday, October 28, 2007

Spanky's Lounge

A beautiful night, check
Tasty cocktails, check
Costume hilarity, check
Funniest Costume Party Prize? (CHECK)
... a super bad ass Halloween Party, check!

Gonzo, L. , and Me rockin the costumes.

Spanky's Lounge was once again a festive party atmosphere. Liser definitely knows how to throw a ripper. There was enough food for 40, enough beer for a fraternity party, and a fully stocked professional looking bar of death. I tried to stick to the beer, but the drink specials that were posted on the chalk board were ever changing and I couldn't help sampling each and everyone. To wash the evening down, Nothing says lovin like that last Captain Morgan's and coke that only gets the splash of soda to hit you in the face like a shovel.

Here's a simple halloween costume for you all to try should you be at a loss for ideas. Total cost $5.38 (+beer)

Step1. Drink an 18 pack of Molson Canadian, suppliment that with an additional 12'er of microbrew bottles. This will allow you to chuckle at the thought of what you're actually going to create, as well as supplying raw materials.

Step2. Find adhesives, tape, glue, staples, whatever you have lying around,.... cannibalize the boxes so that you have the following.

Step3. A test run, followed by wrapping the creation in gift paper, attach a bow or something to be extra cool

Step4. Pimp it out with some bitchin clothes, and over the top aviators, style hair to cockboy boy band bullshiat

Step5. Get hammered at a Halloween party and tell everyone that asks that the "box is filled with candy rainbows and puppies" If they don't believe you have 'em reach into the box. (I actually filled the box with was a chilly evening and I didn't want Mr. Wang to get cold... I also didn't expect someone to keep a hand in the box for the duration of the party.. it would have been ok with me.. but It really wasn't an option) Thankyou L for playing along.

At the end of the evening do what any sane drunk person would do. Remove the box and toss it into a raging bonfire. It's an easy costume and I think that I have enough raw material to make another one...maybe!?

Friday, October 26, 2007

Addendum to the last post

~ Working oncall, such that emergencies = my ass working on a regular day off. Not complaining, just wading into the OverTime pool of luke warm goodness.

Halloween Party at Spanky's lounge - I'm still working on the box with which to put my junk for the Halloween costume, it was scheduled for completion this evening, that and the draining of a 30rack for posterity. As it was, I only had a few beers with dinner and half a bottle of table wine when I got called to Come into the Orafice.

A HUGE Congrats to the McG's on the sale of their palatial digs in Liverpool NY. South Carolina sounds like a marvelous place to live. "The Funtruck may join you... look to the North for the flash / mushroom cloud, it'll signify the coming of the Jebus" (<= insert a double tap of the old Mach Truck Air Horn)

Also on the horizon for the Shagz Von NoDirection-Inlife, a phone interview with a museum for the Assitant Registrar's Position. Unfortunately, I can no longer fit everything I own into my vehicle and be anywhere in the lower 48 within 5days. Of course the gig isn't in the lower 48, but a week of travel would still have me knocking on the frontier's door. "It's the couch mAaaan, it ties the room together"


1st yr at the Gazette
~Design Ads
~Make Plates
~Crop and tone photos
~ (shit pay, working nights)

1 3/4yrs at the Gazette
~Design Ads
~Make Plates
~Crop and tone photos
~Edit Comics/ Color Comics
~Edit Puzzles/ Games
~Edit Weather
~Create and output Classified Reports
~Create and output Stock pages
~Create and output Obituaries
~Create and output Opinions
~Upload Paper for Website (Edition 1, 2, & 3
~(Proof all electronic pages) Output entire paper
~Olive (webdesign)
~(Proof all Negatives)
~Burst Wrappers
(Same Shit pay, working longer in to the night)

Fit dinner in there somewhere and try to whizz at least once a night.

Starting to look very similar to the So. Vermont Arts Center, we all know what happened there.

......And on that note I'm heading home early

Thursday, October 25, 2007

Do you know these Folks?

Chances are if you live on Beaver Bog, you may.
Roadtrip comin soon, 3yrs is too long. It's also nice to know that there are other Vampires in the world=> chill down the crypt and be prepared to party like rockstars til dawn.

Congratulations Gettin' Hitched~!!!!!

And....."I don't believe that there's anything beer can't do" as per out conversation in the wee hours of the drunken morning.


During my first supermarket trip since the fiasco, I was psyched to killa chicken, get some potato, and veggies, fresh fruit to avoid scurvy and also had the fortune to be in quite possibly the slowest 20 Items or less aisle in history. Price Check Sally (there's a song in there somewhere) was having a horrible day. It wasn't that she was inept... she just had the dubious job of ringing out unlabeled cans, boxes, and didn't really know her vegetables to type in the codes. She was pleasant so, no harm no foul.

While standing in line; I would assume, like everyone else I was scanning other peoples purchases and coming up with a personality profile to fit each individual shopper. Not only in my own aisle but the surrounding as well. It was easier to make a snap judgement with the surrounding consumers because they were expeditiously shuffling through their checkouts with extreme efficiency. In my aisle, I was bracketed by two ladies. Between them both they may have pushed 150lbs, and combined they could quite possibly have been 180yrs old. I shouldn't have thought anything strange except for the fact that along with the little old ladies I was also bracketed by 75 or so rolls of toilet paper. The little old woman in front of me had a value pack, the one behind...individual rolls. "?could it be cheaper to buy individual rolls rather than sport for the cash for a handy carrying case of ass wipin materials?" I was intrigued. Still am, Although I couldn't help thinking on my way to the Bitch-Ass Frankensteiner that they were in league together and one of their elderly male neighbors with a perfectly manicured lawn was going to have a bitch of a time getting all the toilet paper horrification removed from his trees, off his house, and out of his superbly weeded perennials. Hmmmmm I would have offered to drive them if that be the case, but I doubt it.

Liser's HAlloween Party this weekend at Spanky's Lounge ( No Shaggy Bob's Funtruck Booze Cruz, I'm a passenger for this shindig)... I should be able to post pics on Sunday.

Tuesday, October 23, 2007


So... apparently a single guy, with a well stocked pantry, a 2 mile commute, and zero funding, can survive for at least 10 days without spending a dime. It's strange, yet satisfying that it can be done. It makes the thought of a future kick in the old hairy beanbag seem less formidable. 1 1/2 weeks more; of a non-funded life, and I should be right as rain with the old bank account. I've decided to stop shaving, turn off my cel phone, use candles, and other than work stay away from technology in preparation for my move to the Adirondack park and an off-the-grid lifestyle.

SUCK IT, society!!

Sunday, October 21, 2007

Expresso beans

I think that now would be a good time to say that eating a ginormous bag of chocolate covered expresso beans, all the while washing down with a Dunkin Donut's French Vanilla XXextra large brew is a poor idea. I've seen the end of the end of time and it rests at the synapses firing behind my eyes. I know it ends because I looked into my own eyes without a mirror and got lost there for a few minutes. "I am a human spirograph and spinning makes the patterns better".

There's a dog barking outside and he's telling me to......... (Fade to black)

A heart beat is only a good thing when it wants to beat out of your chest.

Thursday, October 18, 2007

Todays Randomness

Today's Randomness is brought to you by, A raging hit to the wallet for vehicle repairs, the word Austerity : aus·ter·i·ty
Function:noun 1: the quality or state of being austere 2 a: an austere act, manner, or attitude b: an ascetic practice 3: enforced or extreme economy, and the number $9.35 account balance.

I've put that in my pipe and I'm afraid to smoke it, and will be until a week from now.

bread loaf, fluffernutter....beat that horse until it's dogfood.

Strange Brew

Original Trailer, "click the link above already, you hoser"

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

The Cruz is on Hold

SO, the last poster was not meant to confuse, only to not reveal the suprise funtruck tour to The Finger Lkes region for a 30th B-day celebratory wine tasting tour on Cayuga Lake. HAppy B-day again Jen. It was quite the weekend, a wine tasting tour is something every grown adult should do at least once in their life time. The Frankensteiner was the libation station for the weekend stocked with cases of goodness, both alcoholic and non-alcoholic. ( More about the frankensteiner later on) The Pinto rented a house right on the lake, and we had a fantastic crew for the tasting and after party. Mr. X and I stayed up with the fire until about sunrise to cash out the remaining beers.

It was a marvelously planned weekend and way too much fun. Thank you Pinto and Jen for the hospitality. I returned home in a roundabout way with a case of wine and a thorough appreciation for the new and different tastes that wine can provide.

I arrived late in the evening Friday and missed the turn to the lake house a couple of times, back tracked, missed again, lost phone reception, missed a few more times. Not a big deal I was in the Frankensteiner and roadtrippin is what I do. When I finally found the specific dirt road pull off drive that lead to the digs for the weekend I was psyched until half way down the road to the house, I could see the lake and my brakes went soft. Not just soft, pedal slammed to the floor to get a bit of slow down action soft. I didn't fill my pants, but I did realize that something was incredibly wrong. I made it to the parking area and stopped, brake fluid was leaking from ass end of my truck like a pinched off garden hose. I didn't want to put a damper on the weekend so I found the time later to duct tape where the leak was. When I left Sunday I stopped at a parts store and bought some fluid and filled the tank. It didn't last long and I didn't want to go back.... I kept driving and made an emergency stop in 'Cuse. ( Thank you to the McG Family for the two days of surfin while I waited for the repairs to get finished) I coasted into a Monroe Brake place at 9am on Monday since everyplace was closed Sunday afternooner when I made to the Central NY. I sat at that G-Damned place until 5pm.... It still wasn't fixed, they replaced all the lines and the Master Cylinder. They had a part delivered and it was a busted piece of junk so they had to have a Rochester distributor over night a part for this morning. I made it back to my place at noon today 5days after the initial problem, 3 since I started my return trip. "The frankensteiner is no longer the name of my's official new nickname is the BITCH-Rod Frankensteiner." I have now replaced basically every part of it since I purchased it used 4yrs ago. Bitch-rod Franknsteiner (BRF) seems to fit, and from hence that will be the name. I can't tell you the number of things that went through my head while traveling 25mph the 75miles to Syracuse white knuckled and ready to double foot the brake in an instant. I was frazzled.... still am frazzled. I can't count the number of times some higher being decided to turn red lights green for me on the trip just as I realized I wasn't going to stop. IT IS TOTALLY POSSIBLE TO DRIVE YOUR VEHICLE USING THE E-BRAKE FOR NORMAL BRAKING, don't let anyone lie to you. I've done it.... and survived.

The guys at Monroe had catcher mitt sized hands, and they had no qualms about balling them up into fists and pounding me in the old "O"-ring with'em. I know that they do lube jobs at the place it's a chain after all, but they were against using the lube on my fuzzy white ass.

All future ShaggyBob's Funtruck Booze Cruz adventures have been postponed; I'll be setting rain dates when I can make them feasable, I'd like to thank the McG's "thank you for your generosity my fam". I mentioned something about my networth with regard to just my bank account about a week ago. At the time it was the day before payday and I was worth 2 bucks for every year I've been on the planet. It is decidedly lower now with the balance hovering at I owe money for every year I've been alive now.

If it's not one thing it's another, I've decided the lemonade from the lemons in my life could now fill a bathtub and I'm hopping in with some steel wool to bathe, scrub scrub scrub all day long.... and I'm opening my eyes under the lemon water just for spite. I'm going to cut up some habeneros, not wash my hands and go take a whizz to wake me up from this dream.

Had I thought about the whole situation rationally; instead of like a scared little gigham skirt wearing sally, I would have at the initial realization popped on the flight helmet, backed up the lake road, strapped in and parked my truck further into the lake, head butted my steering wheel, had My buddy Pinto drop kick "Spine me" and called my insurance company to get a new vehicle. Hind sight is 20 x 20.

Rain Dates will be posted and I'll try to get ahold of all that were in the plans for the up coming weeks. My hotmail account is on the fritz so expect a few calls and some apologetic Shagginess. Willem and Kate, I'm going to try to give you a ring in a few to chat in person...I'm just waiting so that I don't interrupt your dinner. Willem I have to skip the Nippo "CC" tweak of golf on Saturday and shall not be making the run up your way On friday. I would If I could swing it, but it's not in the cards.

On a totally different note, Congradulations to Jenn E. and Brett on their engagement this past weekend, sorry I won't be able to celebrate with you this weekend.

Thursday, October 11, 2007


.....and now your literary haiku for the day.

Rene Descartes "Discourse on Method"

If I think, I am.
If I don't exist, how do
I know about me?

~David M. Bader

<=Insert Air Horn Blast=>

Freedom isn't Free

US NAVY SEAL Lt. Michael P. Murphy

Thank you my friend, thank you.

Wednesday, October 10, 2007


When in doubt, editorialy or if an AD is Late......Replate!

Today is an exercise in futility. Of the 160 plates for the paper tonight that I've already made, editorial/advertising mistakes have allowed me to replate 60. I'm no statistician but those to me seem like bad odds for getting out of work on time this evening. Since individual plates are a cost effective $7 apiece for their oh so long lived, functional lives of up to but not always 6hrs. I think the fact that folks in editorial and sales representatives that are putting their stamp of approval on the work that needs to be redone should be fined. Equally since I'm in the mood.... Professional basketball players should be fined for missing free-throws as well. 10 feet high, 15ft away, basket never moves, and probably hasn't since these multi-millionaires were first shooting free-throws @ 5yrs old. If you can't shoot 95% or better from the line, you get your ass fined 5g's for being lazy.

Today's Randomness is once again brought to you by 2mm printing press plates, the word (*&$@#! %) Adj / noun: an obscenity screamed at the top of ones vocal range, primarily just after ruining a third pair of pants, while working with 2mm printing press plates, and the number 3. Because every thing good comes in threes.

Tuesday, October 9, 2007

Night side

There are many things that really don't seem promising for a social creature when they work at night. I had considered making a top ten list of suckage, but came up with too many options and couldn't weed out any that weren't viable. That basically means that the top 35 list of why working nights licks the hairy beanbag is out. Sleep depervation comes with the territory on a regular basis. The world passes me by in solitude for the most part.

Here's an excerpt from a 4page rant that I had considered posting after a dismal evening/morning at best.

....... and after a long night at work, similar to people that work during the day, one needs to decompress, prior to falling asleep and getting some rest. If the dayside folks head home after a long day, they cook dinner, watch the tube (no doubt junkies for reality type shows, or a series that they look forward to weekly), interact with family and friends. Nightside is a bit different, I cook dinner prior to work. I gave up cable years ago because I was sick of watching infomercials and having conversations with Ron Popeil about the flaws in his "set it and forget it" theory of quantum roasting philosophy. I couldn't bear the thought of a DR Trimmer Mower Commercial. No-one but me to keep me company. I've learned how to open the Building door silently, and eek my way up the stairs, I've memorized the creaky spots in my floor so as not to disturb the folks downstairs sleeping. While in college, reading a book would put me to sleep in seconds, now it's my relaxation/down time after work. Depending on the book, sometimes I fall sleep after a few chapters, sometimes when the sunrises. It's not my fault, my internal clock has adjusted to the solitude. Mary Shelley was incredibly deft at her lighting the spark of monsterousness when developing the Frankenstein novel. Last night I was lost in a world that wasn't even close to my own and reveled in the fact that the good Dr. was there to keep me company. I Vamped out, and cringed at the sun-rising, closed the crypt shades in the Oasis at 7am and peacefully fell asleep.

The difference between my mouse like existance nightside when home and the 7 other apartments of dayside people in my building isn't astounding, it's life. There's nothing quiet about their waking, entering and leaving of the building, music, tv, movies, conversations. Morning is not for me, but is for other people. Most of the time I can deal and just stay in that place between sleep and awake tossing and turning. Somedays, it's different - trains pass miles away blaring horns at intersections, the neighbors have an arguement over waffle syrup, Babies cry, car alarms go off, garbage trucks beep to haul away trash, and the maintenance crew of the complex decide that 8am -2pm they're going to use the DR Trimmer Mower Chipper Shredder Rototilling Chainsaw Leaf Blower Whacker under my window to keep the landscaping proper for the dayside folks to enjoy.

I lost the ability to complain when I chose to work evenings to boost the ol resume and get some much needed practice with the programs we use. Weekends are no better but I can live without the sleep, meeting up with folks that are day people and trying to wake when they do just leaves me in a funk, but I enjoy their company, a little funk never hurt anyone.

Today was a rough one, 1hr of sleep. Coffee doesn't impress the bags under my eyes, in fact the sucken eyeball sockets are in a state of disdain, itchy, heavy.... I'm not enjoying Zombie........

....And 'SCENE'

Monday, October 8, 2007

Flight Helmets

Parody link

The above is a link to what everyone in the country might be thinking right about now with regard to Hollyweird. A spoof song of Nickelback's "Rockstar"

Sunday, October 7, 2007


Redonkulous weekend. Goodtimes, good food, too much booze and very little sleep. I'll post some pics later in the evening. Flight helmets look good on everyone no matter who you are. Thanks Boone and Jen for joining happy hour at the Oasis.Tahnk you to D and Kristi for hosting the throw down. I only have one gripe from the weekend and it's not even a really big dealy.

If, say, you're from Long Island, visiting Saratoga Springs, and happen to enjoy the ambiance of the IceHouse. It only makes you look like a pipe (I would have written tool, but I like the sound of Pipe better) if you act like a mobster straight out of the Sopranos. If you're playing pool and try to shark only to have a mumbling stuttering slobbering prick like me thump your ass you shouldn't feed the rabid squirrels. Getting in a guys face and talking you're pseudo badassedness will only make you look like more of an ass. Specially if there was no money on the game and the whole loss on your end was 8 quarters. Step outta line ya get whacked bullshit doesn't fly. Even your friends put their heads down in shame over your actions. If you are a true mobster, and need to break some knee caps.... do it in Jersey, don't taint the Saratoga area with good fellas-esque behavior. Flashing your wad of cash is only cool when it's made out of denominations higher than Geo Washington. Pipe A! OH, go get yer shine box.

Friday, October 5, 2007

Thursday, October 4, 2007

All Better

After a dismal day yesturday, I decided to treat myself to something good. No pictures because it only lasted 30 minutes after I finished prep and cooking.

Nothing makes a man feel better than being waited on at the Meat/Fish counter of a local butcher. Whatcha need...."I don't know" I felt like Peter Venkman sipping schnapps on the steps of a campus library. I don't really despise fish anymore, apparently my taste buds have wandered from the norm. SO, Sword fish or Ahi? I went with swordfish. They were accomadating and selected a prime specimen about as big as a medium sized dinner plate.

Broiled Blackened SwordFish steak
Smothered in Kiwano and Papaya (i.e. some undersetimated tasty mush)
Dark Rum (cooked off alcohol)
Splashed with Limon (Lime and lemon for the real people of the world)
Garnished with a few green onion ringlets.

Side dish...Nili P. Sbmashed PBotatoes.

Pre-made fruit tart for dessert.

All is right with the world.

Wednesday, October 3, 2007


Yup...just a matter of time, 3/4 inch gash to the webbing between thumb and index finger of my left hand. Today is marvelous.

And just so you know...should you decide to comment on a co-workers dinner. A fuckin tray of lasagna doesn't qualify for the snarky statement "Enjoy your snacks". Go back to your computer and edit whatever it is you fucking edit, don't waste time misdiagnosing food stuffs that aren't any of your business and get your portion of the paper finished on deadline without mistakes. Stick your "snacks" up your ass you can use my spork if it fits sideways.'s officially time for me to get my panties out of a bunch

Today's Randomness

Today's Randomness is brought to you by, Rank and foul moods, the word aplomb • \uh-PLAHM\ • noun
: complete and confident composure or self-assurance : poise, and the number go "F" yourself.

It's truly a bad day when you start out of the apratment at 3pm; having just woken up due to Alarm clock malfunction, stagger lurch trip stumble and fall down a flight of stairs a la keystone cop on the way to get your Morning/afternoon paper that you've previously read while printing it the night before, only to realize that looking at your truck out the building front door that a tire is flat. It's a winner of a day on this end, all I need now is a swift yet firm kick in the junk and my day will be complete. New tire... don't mind if I do!?

A Fed Ex box truck cut me off turning at a green arrow (fairly busy intersection) causing me to abruptly double foot my brake, the car behind me only missing by inches as it sailed into the intersection and "kinda" got T-boned by some monkey that decided that a red light was optional. Thank you Schenetadirt Police for being three cars back and holding me up for a statement about the "mysterious Fed -Ex vehicle that no-one at the intersection seemed to notice." Right of way allegations and numerous outbursts of the growing road rage from all parties didn't help. Calm cool and collected I was, until I had to reiterated my statement the 4th time to Mr. Copper to pen down on his report. "How do you like my shiny brand new tire?" It's not his fault but I'm in a foul and Rank mood. Green arrow vs. red light, plus Fed Ex fuck..... miserable. Med black coffee all over my truck.

Dunkin donuts... don't get me started..I rolled through the drive through prior to Fed-ex fun. Large French Vanilla Coffee, "cream and suger"? yes, "cream and sugar"? yes! Somewhere between the speaker outside and the headset (possibly the air inbetween the ear piece and the other side of the broads melon) Large French Vanilla Coffee with cream and sugar turned into med. black coffee and a bavarian creme donut. {The rub: no-one in the store ordering, no cars behind me}. It's just the day. It's just the day....

Tonight, I make plates for the paper, 1.5mm aluminum death. Pre-print not finished, I get to prep. and burn an estimated 200 plates this evening. 4 corners to each plate multiplied by 200 gives me a good 800 opportunities to lacerate myself not counting the sides of the plate of course 1600 opportunities is a bit much for me to handle at this point. I'm not going to hold my breath, the first aid kit is already out.

Screw you and your new shoes I say...
Bite me
Go F yerself
"It's not going to suck itself"....

Rank and foul moods.....

Monday, October 1, 2007


Next stop on the Tour is a well needed venture into the Toga region again. The Boone is soon to be headed off to a new life down yonder in 'Bama so it's time to hit it! IN TOGA-Town. A huge NASA sendoff of biblical proportions.

The weekend starts with 'Teasers @ the Oasis Friday afternooner followed by a brief travel time to the DT area of Toga, Phila/Caroline triangle of death anchored by none other than the Ice House. Drop yer linen and quit yer grin'in rolling thunder is in the air.

Cooler Nights

I've noticed a significant change in my sleeping habits now that the weather has cooled off a bit. I'm slowly making my way from Vampire to early morning riser. Like a rock, my pillow smashes me in the face when I get home from work and doesn't let go until like hour that I really haven't enjoyed for two years now. Coffee in the morning instead of early afternoon seems to fit better.

I had the opportunity to watch Pan's Labyrinth sans the volumous alcohol and wish I hadn't. It was a disappointment. I had been geared up to see fablistic nonsense that would make my head spin and instead pulled in the military/rebelious aspect. The fable parts were overshadowed byt he platent "Cptian" being ruthless and shooting everyone with reckless abandon. Even the ending was a let down...although it was right in tune with the over all jist of the flick. It's a renter not a buyer for sure.

15yrs ago today....

One of my all time favorite bands and songs hit the airwaves.