Monday, February 25, 2008

Never thought

I never thought it would be beneficial to me ever, to continue to work at a dead-end jobby job. As of this moment, I welcome the time to focus my attention on something else. I recognize depression... it leads to me sleeping inordinate amounts of time. I usually fore go meals. I drink in excess. (me...drinking excessive amounts by my standards). 2 weeks have worked their way into my life without being invited, but I'm neither sleeping them away, nor hunger striking, I've curbed my booze intake => abstaining from it totally.

Just over a year and change ago, I was battling with addiction; I kicked Mr. Brownstone in the ass and sent him packing. At the time I lost enough weight to cause concern with my friends and relatives. (most didn't or don't know why I was wafer thin and that's ok) I'm not proud of that time in my life. I had steadily gained back some of the weight, and topped out at just under my all time high of 175lbs. I'm 6'2" and that's respectable I guess even though I never carry and mass.

A quick glance in the mirror this afternoon has me officially back down to skeletor, "I may be a sexy bitch in a hospital gown, but take me out of it and I look like a vampire" (I joke about this often... working the graveyard "almost" shift, never seeing the sun and whatnot) It's not funny anymore.

Granted stress can be a bit harsh on the system, losing 28-ish lbs in a week, is a Super Model's lucid waking wet dream to stardom. I eat regularly, I eat a Shit-ton of food, I eat healthy. A stiff breeze shouldn't lift me from the ground.

A nap would do me good right now.

1 comment:

Kristi said...

Oh Bob, I'm sorry you're going through this. Take care of yourself and know you have people who care.