Tuesday, September 16, 2008

In the shitter

Thanks to Ike (The Hurricane not Tina's Ex) and Chet from accounting (on wall street not from Weird Science) it looks like we're in for a bit of the old economic rogering. Unforunately gas prices will spike very soon, and continue to stay up there until the election in November, I say this because what oil producing nation wouldn't want to see if our new president has a set of stones (...and that includes our own country since we supply 70% of our oil to ourselves, those money grubbing whores).

What-with-all the gas prices looming and the fall of our economy as we know it. Stock market Schmock market what has that got to do with the money in my pocket? plenty, but I have a feeling that one Good Old American product won't fail, it will continue to strive and be there for you and me ( You and I is way to formal). what could it be you ask...welll, I'll tell ya. Even Chet living on his meager unemployment; which is still probably 5X my salary, waxing his now defunct gas guzzling Maserati will find solace in the fact that a back yard barb-que kicks Fois Gras in the dick.

Hotdogs are here to stay, gas may be expensive, but a package of tubed by-products in all their glory won't be made too expensive by the powers that be. Not in my life time by gum. Weiners, dogs, brats, sausages, ball parks, koshers, white, and reds, polish, german, fuck it..... All the tubed meat we can eat is waiting on the grocery market shelves. It'll never go bad in all it's sleuce floor goodness, packaged for the summer but damn it, toasted in nuclear fall out will do the trick just the same. Mmmmm Hotdogs, greasy, lips and assholes hotdogs.

F*ck Wall Street, and f*ck the Oil Conglomerates. F*ck you, f*ck me, f*ck it all and eat a hotdog. That's how it should be, you don't like mustard on your dog? F@CK Tell that to Chet and Ike, then tell them their pussies for not agreeing with you. I dig mustard, but if you don't that doesn't make you unAmerican. Buy a hotdog at a gas station after you get raped at the pump, it'll make it all better. Even if the dog has been rolling all day, and night, probably for two days and nights the sweatier the better, steal a few ketchup packets and some relish, their prices will surely be affected by the economic crush and you'll feel better by doing it, but not the tubed meat my friend buy a package, a single dog or stop and buy a dog at DirtyNick's hotdog stand. Hotdogs will save this country from it's woes. HOT F@ckin DOGS

**** This message was brought to you by: ShaggyBob's Dog Cart, "Where the Hair is Either on The Bun or in the Sun, Baby Wooooooooooooo!!!"



Anonymous said...

yer a weinie.

Shaggy Bob said...

Great retort from the peanut gallery, he/she who decides to remained unnamed. You're a weinie too, a foot long, county fair E-coli weinie with dirt on it. Hah!

Willem said...

Ballpark FTW. The PLUMP when you cook them!