Monday, June 4, 2007

Big Empty Spaces

Curtain fiasco has been dealt with and shall hereto forth never be mentioned again by me or my suffering boys. I'd like to thank all the snooty curtain representatives at the various stores for making me feel the way I made others feel when I was selling $75,000 paintings to moldy oldies in VT. I am humbled by your knowledge of curtaininity, and just wanted something simple, that I could stealthily wipe boogers on without remorse should the occasion arise. I will never again treat another human being like a moron even if they exibit blatent signs that they're a bit slow on the comprehension aspect of our personal interaction. The people at,...... more specifically Hottie McHots-a-Bitchwhoreslut at Pier One can "lick the backside of my hairy beanbag". Thanks for nuthin' now get back to fluffing pillows C#@T. [Ouch that's gotta hurt, I hope you're reading this.... call me!? ]

Setting up a new place is difficult, I'm trying to use this move to straighten out some other aspects of my life as well. You know straighten up and fly right type stuff. Maybe act my age and whatnot. Although All I can seem to focus on is matching all the new furniture to an antique table that I have. I may have to postpone the release of "I Do What I Want Always" ,the online version in the works for your reading pleasure. Expected release date (when I get around to it)

I never was the most frugal person when it came to anything. In fact I think I'm more prone to excess and the wanton throwing of monies at the most available and easiest solution to anything, with an extra beer before I hit the road, and knowledge that ramen noodles can infact sustain you during an interim bout of pennilessnessitude.

Next on the agenda, entertainment and lounging furniture. I can't just fill my place like a funhouse foam/ livingroom isn't recessed and the foam/balls would all escape out the front door or pour off the balcony. Getting a Sh*t-ton of bean bags wouldn't be good either. ( Y'all know that I'm prone to cutting myself at random times with blunt objects, I can't imagine the clean up from numerous beanbags) And yes I did manage to cut myself whilst hanging the V-blinds this past weekend....I'm ok though, it was only my foot {no stitches}. So I guess the next step is this "Futons (plural), or sectional couch (singular) w/ recliners, and cupholders built into the upholstery?"

Then it's on to lighting, unless I get a fit of the "I don't cares" and just head off to the second hand furniture store and pick me out a motley mish-mash of stinky pre-owned digs complete with ingrained homeless and/or fart smell. [That probably won't happen I'm trying to be a grown-up and frat furniture isn't going to cut it anymore].

I'd like to say howdy to Mr. Pinto, and thankyou for the call at 2am Saturday. I know where you were, but I doubt you did. Sorry about you're hyperventilation. I lied, I really didn't get a 10 gauge hoop piercing of the scrote "FOR The LADIES"...just thought I could make beer come out your nose. Breathe easy man...breathe easy.

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