Monday, June 11, 2007

That'll learn'em

I've decided that in lieu of the West Coast starlet/celebrity crisis and the impending future ridiculosity that I will gladly offer my services. The ShaggyBob School of Attitude Adjustment is now open for business. It's a simple way for young hot celebrities out yonder, to finally get the attention that they most assuradly are lacking in their personal lives, right the wrongs that they have produced for society and gain some self respect that attention whores need to survive in this oh so terrible world.

The ShaggyBob School of Attitude Adjustment is there for you ladies. My simple yet effective attitude adjustment system is nothing short of the latest and greatest throwback to a by gone era of smartening you right the fuck up. Simply pay the modest $35,000/hr fee and I will be more than happy to travel to your home and spank you until my hand hurts. My sevices are available long term as well, only requiring a significantly high priced sports car and a blow job no less than twice a day. I'm waiting for your call, any time, anywhere I will make myself available. Need an Attitude Adjustment in Vegas? I'm there. Need an attitude adjustment on your private Carribean Island? I'm there. No place is too far, no spanking is too hard. If you're lucky maybe I'll have terriblely bad aim or glance a blow off your ass and mistakenly stick a thumb in your butt. ATTITUDE ADJUSTED.

Since the grand opening of the ShaggyBob School of Attitude Adjustment was just 3minutes ago I expect you Miss Lohan, Miss Hilton and other Miss Hilton, and you Miss Spears to be dialing me up for a consultation. Miss Alba ,Miss Biel, your attitude adjustments are on the house you both seem pretty down to earth. The first attitude adjustment is only one good ass whackin away. Consultation visits are not clothing optional, get naked and ready for a spanking, you deserve it, you need it, and most importantly you want get on the phone and call the ShaggyBob School of Attitude Adjustment, bend over and prepare to get adjusted.

My name is ShaggyBob and I want to spank your pretentious ass.

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